hai the human who concern me!

water color painting... the white rose... finish 1.1.2012. i never give a try to finish my painting but this time.... what ever it is i determine to finish it... i will do my best... the white rose is usually symbolic to a purity, innocence yet the graceful of all color... what i mean is... so sacred and holy.... by the way.. what i like about the rose is... the flower that i never found it anywhere... the flower that have a thorn although it beautiful to see... the blooming... the color and so with the philosophy that being insert on the beautiful flower.... exactly... there have they on story why i like the rose.... maybe i will not try to story it... but trust me... the story is very sad... indeed a nightmare to me.... heheheh

hope all of you really appreciate what is art... what is the contained of art... and what is the beautiful behind the stroke of the brush... really..! important...

sometime.. i gladly to say that...this is the gateway to express your feeling to visual something what do you think beautiful... the beautiful around us have to be explore... and the beautiful that we see need to be convert in to a painting... or what ever as long that u can express your feeling... to me... i have my own define about art...

"art can get crazy to know it and to overcome nevertheless provide the logical thinking trough out what is right now, past and future because art is with you"

so if u can get what is my meaning... art is free... its simple and no need to get rigid in certain issue yet to get appropriate in drawing. lets just say... when u want to let go your chaotic mind that always on a war, u just express it till u satisfy on the drawing block...

brush stroke... childish drawing... color playing.... u just let it happen in the world that u create in the white paper.....

when u start to blow!

well... firstly i love to say that... im not a good dancer.. each time when i say that... i will be more cofident... u know what.? thats is the way i improve myself in each part because i know what is my weaknesess. hahaha... something that odd to say but that is a normal pattern in my life.... zapin pekajang is the one of the dancing routine that i enjoy in this sem... while i dont have nothing to do... this routine make me more confident than i thought...

its not easy... need a practice and yet... need more detail in each step... talking about which... im quit depress with the step that provide detailed... of course! nominate as a MAKUM person is a big responsible to be had and to accept it... while i thinking about that tittle... once again... im quite dreaming because you bring UPSI name.... its such a heavy responsibility .. nevertheless im just think positive in any aspects... hahahahha what the shame

thanks to my friends that always support me... encik zul that trust me... and also cik murni that give me a new lesson in zapin pekajang although i very hate tradisional dance.... hahahaha because...maybe the original movement make me want to cry ... i have to bend... because i so big and tall.... :P

hahaha anyway ... im miss this dance routine... and not to forget... een, liliy, samn, daus, yoha, faisal, amin, nasrul, momo, pian, am and alif... thank guys... always support me... heheheh im just really want to dance again with u guys... hahaha

talking about experience.... i have many experience that i cant forget... start from choosing .... and then practice in studio... and finally go to the arena... wow... it kind of a big respect... let u olls know.... we just dont get a number... but we get anugerah khas juri.... wow!!!!!

the think that we cant forget... is... while we dance... suddenly light piss off... blackout!!!! but we still dance as usual... hahahaha true story and i say to myself... just focus... what ever happen!!! hahahaha... and we dance in the dark in 5 minute.... what the best part is... we doing a great job and i have lots amazing experience that i want to share!!! hahahaha wuhuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!

by the way.... im just happy with myself... because this is the first time for me...!

when u start to blow!

well... firstly i love to say that... im not a good dancer.. each time when i say that... i will be more cofident... u know what.? thats is the way i improve myself in each part because i know what is my weaknesess. hahaha... something that odd to say but that is a normal pattern in my life.... zapin pekajang is the one of the dancing routine that i enjoy in this sem... while i dont have nothing to do... this routine make me more confident than i thought...

its not easy... need a practice and yet... need more detail in each step... talking about which... im quit depress with the step that provide detailed... of course! nominate as a MAKUM person is a big responsible to be had and to accept it... while i thinking about that tittle... once again... im quite dreaming because you bring UPSI name.... its such a heavy responsibility .. nevertheless im just think positive in any aspects... hahahahha what the shame

thanks to my friends that always support me... encik zul that trust me... and also cik murni that give me a new lesson in zapin pekajang although i very hate tradisional dance.... hahahaha because...maybe the original movement make me want to cry ... i have to bend... because i so big and tall.... :P

hahaha anyway ... im miss this dance routine... and not to forget... een, liliy, samn, daus, yoha, faisal, amin, nasrul, momo, pian, am and alif... thank guys... always support me... heheheh im just really want to dance again with u guys... hahaha

talking about experience.... i have many experience that i cant forget... start from choosing .... and then practice in studio... and finally go to the arena... wow... it kind of a big respect... let u olls know.... we just dont get a number... but we get anugerah khas juri.... wow!!!!!

the think that we cant forget... is... while we dance... suddenly light piss off... blackout!!!! but we still dance as usual... hahahaha true story and i say to myself... just focus... what ever happen!!! hahahaha... and we dance in the dark in 5 minute.... what the best part is... we doing a great job and i have lots amazing experience that i want to share!!! hahahaha wuhuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!

by the way.... im just happy with myself... because this is the first time for me...!

keakraban terserlah tq ira

thanks to ira sebab bawa mijan g makan kat umah ira... kali pertama di pelawa makan bersama... terasa bersyukur sangat2 kerana kita dihargai... kali pertama juga disambut mesra tanpa rasa kita ini bukan orang asing....

gembira... itulah yang dapat aku ungkapkan... kerana seolah-olah pertolongan kita dibalas dengan keikhlasan... thanks sangat2... aku sebenarnya cukup menghargai apa sahaja yang mereka bagi padaku... walaupun aku tidak pernah mengharap sedikit pun ... : )

padaku.. pemberian orang pada ku... tidak kiralah dalam bentuk apa jua sekali pun... aku amat bersyukur kerana bukan mudah orang buat macam tu kat kita.... tidak pernah sekali pun aku merasakan sesuatu yang bernilai selain dari pemberian orang...

aku bersyukur dengan semua itu ya Allah kerana rezeki... bukan bermaksud aku mengada-ngada untuk tulis blog dan menceritakan kebaikan kawan2 ku... tapi apa yang aku lihat ialah sesuatu yang jarang berlaku pada ku...

siapa lah aku sampai orang sanggup menelrfon ku dan mengajak aku makan bersama? sejujurnya.. aku jarang mahu makan bersama kawan2 ku... kerana aku memang jenis tidak suka makan beramai-ramai... tetapi kali ini aku dapat rasakan keikhlasan terserlah.... syukur pada mu ya Allah..

walaupun orang anggap ini satu benda biasa... tapi bagi ku pula... dari kecik.. aku tidak pernah bahagia bersama kawan2 ku.... tapi kali ini... Kau memberiku sesuatu yang bernilai... thanks ira... kaulah kawan ku dunia dan akhirat... moga,,, ira cepat sembuh... moga ira dapat menempuh hari2 yang mendatang dengan sihat...:) yang penting, selagi mijan kat upsi ni... kalau mijan boleh tolong... mijan tolong.... mijan ucap thanks... kat ira sebab susah2 jer masak daging korban... kalau ira nk tahu.. first time mijan makan daging korban... tqtqtqtqtq...

akhir kata... rasa dihargai dan dipedulikan....

gumbiraaaaa

kenapa aku cakap mcm tu? sebab aku kadang2 tak memahami orang... tak mahu menilai baik buruk sebelum melakukan satu tindakan... aku cuba untuk memahami... setiap jiwa manusia... tapi adakah mereka sedar apa yang aku lakukan kerana aku menyayangi mereka??? tapi aku tertanya,,, siapa yang menyayangi aku? aku ingin sekali bertemu orang yang mcm tu.... mengambil berat pasal kita... menasihati kita... berfikiran matang.... seronoknya dapat kawan yang mcm tu...

dalam hati ni dan setiap hari... aku merasakan sebak bila orang yang kita sayang akan pergi secara perlahan. sebab manusia selalu cepat bosan... tapi terus terang aku katakan... aku tidak cepat bosan dengan orang... aku akan terus menyayangi orang itu walaupun dia pergi meninggalkn aku.... bertapa seksanya jiwa aku kerana ada jiwa yang suka pada orang tapi belum tentu lagi orang suka dekat kita...

terdetik dihati aku... aku tidak mahu mengambil berat.. tapi apakan daya itulah aku.... ak tidak dapat menipu diri sendiri.. apatah lagi org lain... sejujurnya aku mahu jadi org yang jujur.... aku bukan jenis yang hipokrit dengan apa yang aku rasa... namun bila kita terlalu menyayangi org... orang akan rimas dengan kita....

kenapa hati aku ni diduga dengan sedemikian rupa??? nak sayang rasa tak patut... tak nak sayang bukan diriku pula... sejujurnya aku bukan lah org tidak berhati perut... aku sayang ... dan hati aku penuh dengan perasaan... tapi ramai orang yang tidak perasan....

kehadiran aku ini... hanya Allah sahaja yang melihat... mungkin apa yang aku cakapkan ini... ramai yang menafikannya... tapi itu lah yang aku rasa.... sebelum aku mengundur diri... aku mahu ucapkan terima kasih kepada kawan sejatiku yang jatuh dan bangun bersama... yang sentiasa mengambil berat dan luah padaku... kerana kepercayaan nya terhadap ku.... :) aku bukan jenis yang senang dengan kebahagiaan tapi aku akan senang apabila ada orang yang meluahkan masalahnya pada ku... selagi aku boleh tolong... aku tolong dan jenis aku... aku tidak mahu kawan2 ku tergapai gapai tanpa tali.... akhir kata...

jadilah diri sendiri dan Allah itu sentiasa ada tidak kira susah ataupun senang.....

u r star!

i dont know but i do know god give me something that more valuable then i thought... thanks god.. u change me, u understand me, and u give me a bright star in my life... jerry.. u know when i see u.. i see like my brother.. deep in my heart, u r always there when i want to said something... u r the most amazing person that i ever found...

aku pun tak sangka, dalam dunia ni...ada juga org yang faham aku dan mengajar aku untuk menjadi seperti mereka... jerry, if u want to know , your personality and how u handle the situation already amaze me a lot. u know how i fill and u know how i need someone...

i love u as my big brother... u just like one in a million...thanks again for being such a good friend in my life... and i believe in something... when we lost someone, we can get another more good than before. is something i joy with cry....

he know how to entertain me even though he with another friend... so understanding yet he can really make me laughing.... thanks jerry... i dont know how to repay you... and i just want to say... u r my best buddy...hehehehe im so touching...

if u appreciate me.... i 10000kali ganda... appreciate u... if u make me laugh.. i can be more funnier than u thought... if u make me smile... i will cry with joy... but if u sad... be remind i always with you....

jerry, u just what i want... there is lot of human out there are not willing to hear my voice... but u willing to do so... u try your best even i not care about it... u know what i want and u know how to divide love and friendship.... that is a best apart about you when u hang out with me! that why i can fill that u r the most sincere guys and finally i found it!

hheheheheh a thousand of laugh... a thousand of smile... a million lovely side about u... bought of us can fill it.... but when u go... just see trough the sky that i just like a star... far away and isolated but still shine in your heart... heheheh : ) still remember when i was alone , u coming to fetch me and i talk about the star... that night so like a novel episode hahahaha

and it all began when i dance with your segment... we getting more closer and i never say twice with your offer... first time we meet at the library i still shy... but i try my best to talk... hahaha so silly...but from that moment i fill happy because i am a lonely person mannn!! hehehe

and u share your story... i fill that u believe me ... and i fill that i being appreciate all the time... thanks again my buddy... i just want to say thank u for everything.... maybe one day... if i or u get to be a tutor in any university or be a lecturer or be a teacher... i hope that we make a reunion... and we go on vacation hahahahaah that is my dream.... yet i will never forget the other friend also...

i not willing to compare but each of us have a unique side... so i do remind and care about it! : )))))

rezeki

know i really want to talked about our rezeki... maybe u havent seen it or u just ignore it what the hell going on hahahaa just joking...

bercakap mengenai rezeki... kita harus menilai bukan setakat duit yang menjadi persoalan... atau duit yang menjadi rezeki... kita selalu alpa yang rezeki itu datang dalam pelbagai bentuk dan cara... kalau kita bangun awal pagi... rezeki yang datang pada kita adalah roh kita yang masuk... kalau roh kita tak masuk... jawabnya kiok...

kedua adalah kesihatan yang kita miliki... ramai orang beranggapan benda itu remeh dan orang selalu tidak nampak... tapi once kita dah sakit baru tahu macam mana rasanya kalau kita sihat dan dapat bergerak... tapi bila kita sihat .. mula la kita buat benda yang tak senonoh... benda yang tak tercapai dek akal mu...

rezeki yang seterusnya adalah makanan... kalau bercakap pasal makanan ni.. memang sesuatu ang wajib kita anggap rezeki badan... sebab kat dunia ni... apa jer benda yang kita makan...semua berbayar... tapi kalau dalam hutan kita makan apa yang berada di hutan pula... allah itu maha kaya dan Allah tidak pernah berkira dalam segala hal.

rezeki itu juga datang dengan kemanisan kita dalam kehidupan... tak terjangkau apa yang kita fikirkan... cuma adakalanya kita alpa dan tidak mahu sedar dengan pemberian yang spontan daripada Allah... walhal nikmatnya ada dimana-mana.